Suddenly, now that it's time to write this review, I feel very lazy. I just ate a brownie. But I'll struggle forward because Fast Cars & Tiki Bars from Wicked deserves at least a half-way decent review. That's what we're all about at Rancho Carne: half-decent and half-assed.
So, Fast Cars & Tiki Bars has the coolest menu screen I've ever seen. Good colors and there's a little Tiki warrior who jumps around waving skulls. The movie is sex, sex, sex with a minimal amount of voice over to introduce each little vigenette. Voodoo (pretending to be French) and Nicole Sheridan (pretending to be dumb...hmmm) rail in a Tiki Bar to start the show. Voodoo fucks her poopcan o' plenty after nailing her vajayjay into next week. No complaints on this scene really. Except that every time I see Voodoo I think "He's gay right? He's gotta be gay."
Some dude screws hot Kelsey up against a hotrod before inserting a bumpy metal apparatus into her rear. That'll get her engine fired right up. The dick that follows into her posteriar crevices helps too. The third scene, a man and a blonde in a bed with ample amounts of leopard-print is alright, but you might as well skip ahead because Randy Spears does the limbo next! Gosh! Then along with Brad Armstrong he gets ficky with Charmane and Gina Ryder (I think.). The girls look identical, each getting a helping of cafeteria-style balls and cock in the front and back. Yum! Dirty Jezebelle is one of my favorites and she's next, daisy-chaining with Bunny Luv and Isabella. The daisy chain gained this movie at least at extra point and Jezebelle's permanent piercings are always appreciated. Lastly, Dillion gets a woody next to a Woodie and gives it to TJ Hart after shooting some 8 mm homevideo of her. It's OK. It ends in ANAL SEX. All capitals so grandpa can get something out of this review.
Yupe, if you rub your dick up against the screen it might even be like being there!
Does FAST CARS AND TIKI BARS sound like it's
right up your alley? Buy it on
DV
DVD Features Include: all access | outtakes | commentary | interview with red ezra | audio bios | behind the scenes photos | chapters | company profile | motion menus | photo gallery | promotional material | star galleries | trailers | wicked casino | wicked web
Cooter the counting cactus says that you are smutmonkey number 2265 to read this Rancho Review.
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